Hansaji Talking on ‘Positivity’

“We have a mind and its job is to think. The mind does its job very well. Yoga clearly states that we always have a choice. We do not have a choice with the kind of situations we face or the circumstances that stand before but we always have a choice on how we face them. We can feel good or bad about the same situation, it is totally up to us how we choose to behave.

If someone is rude to you or speaks badly about you, you need not feel hurt or react. If that person is unable to think good about you then it is his problem, not yours. Why do you feel hurt? Why can you not stop this? Why can we not train ourselves to only think and feel good at all times. It is 100% our decision to live each and every moment happily and meaningfully without any negative or harmful feelings or thoughts.

We do not put enough efforts, therefore in a bad situation, naturally we end up feeling hurt or bad about it. And similarly in a good situation, we naturally feel happy. We are intelligent people, therefore we can look back and understand that whenever we have been tensed or anxious about something, we have not contributed any value to the given situation but have instead ended up hurting our health, mentally and physically. Our pulse, heartbeat, breathing quickens. Our peace of mind and quietude is lost. In fact, each and every organ of our body is suffering during such time.

Therefore, naturally we should make an effort to understand why do I get hurt? The answer is because I thought negatively. Why did I think negatively? Because I expected something from the external world, from the people around me, which I should not.

When Lord Buddha was asked about the cause of all the pain and suffering, he answered in one word only – Desires. We suffer because we desire. If we can stop desiring, we can stop suffering. If we can just focus role and perform our duties, we can be happy and positive.

Another decision that we should take is that when we are performing our duties, our mind should be balanced. If I have to work, then I should work happily and not while holding a grudge.

We had a German student visiting us in the May of 1975. Due to the hot weather in India, he would walk around wearing skimpy clothing. I called him and asked him to cover his body. When he explained himself, I suggested he wear “Khadi”. He agreed and very happily decided to go to Khadi Bhandar, Churchgate to buy the same. When he returned in the evening, he was wearing a beautiful Kurta and Pyjama and looking very cute and happy. On my asking about his day, he narrated his experience saying that India is such a lovely place and Indians are so friendly. He shared how he walked to the station, how he was pushed into the train heading for Churchgate, how during the journey he answered all kinds of questions put up to him by the travellers and how on reaching his destination, he was again kindly pushed out. He was then directed to Khadi Bhandar by friendly strangers and assisted by the shopkeepers to buy all that he needed. He was even helped with his lunch. His return journey to the Institute was similar to his experience in the morning. His experience was so enjoyable that he didn’t realize how quickly his day had passed.

We had another visitor, this time from London, who again was wearing skimpy clothing due to the heat. The German student advised the Briton to visit Khadi Bhandar and buy some Khadi clothes. But within 2 ½ hours, the Briton was back, anger writ all over his face and body. On my asking about what could be bothering him, he shared that everything here was bothering him. He narrated how on his walk to the station, he saw the roads littered with garbage and how people were spitting blood, clearing mucous from his nose etc. I explained that Indians eat “Paan” and that they were not spitting blood. He further shared that the station was so crowded and that he got pushed around when he does not like getting touched at all. During the journey, strangers asked him his name and all kinds of personal questions. He didn’t like sharing any personal details with strangers.

See how different people react to the same situation. Therefore it completely depends on us how we accept situations. If we get bothered, then we take care to not hurt ourselves in the process and try not to repeat the same. If one has to travel by a local train on a daily basis then one has to learn to enjoy it else one will disturb one’s own mental and physical health. If we tend to have negative thoughts or feelings then it is we who are at fault and no one else.

Be it any situation or circumstances, we have to be positive and happy always. If not, then ideally we should just watch the world as an outsider. Observe the variety of people around you, every human is of a different kind, every face has its own expressions, it really is amazing how God has made such a variety of creatures. Observe and do not react. Accept situations as they are. Protect yourself if things are hurting you but nothing more than that.

It is very easy to get disturbed and react. Let’s make an effort to remain balanced at all times. It’s a question of taking a decision and sticking to it. I personally believe that everyone around is justified in their behaviour. Do not label someone’s behaviour as wrong. What someone did and what he should be doing – this kind of talk is incorrect. He is functioning according to his intelligence and his upbringing. He is not wrong. He is what he is. Do not expect him to be anything different from what he is. Accept him as he is. Enjoy him.

Negativity creates disease and Positivity cures disease. Make the choice to be happy and positive at all times. Life will not be a smooth ride, it will have its ups and downs but with the ups and downs, we do not have to experience ups and downs in our mind, we have to remain balanced.”