01 Feb Objectivity – The Road To Happiness
Objectivity – The Road To Happiness
Objectivity as we understand is an unbiased viewpoint. Objectivity is a relaxed state of mind, where ones view is not tainted by overwhelming emotions. Easier said than done! In our daily lives we encounter challenging situation regularly, yet we fail to remain objective in more than most situations.
Recently, someone I knew was suddenly taken ill and admitted to ICU. After days of speculations and treatments, the patient was discharged. Once on home ground, even though in a disoriented and confused state, the individual, wanted to take charge of all the family duties (trying to go back to all the former ways). Instead of relaxing and letting go, perhaps delegating and allowing someone else to take charge. One’s need for control of life and micro- management surprised me. It jolted me to ponder over- the importance of objectivity in one’s life.
Why is it so hard for us humans to just let go, relax and move on in life? Why are our attachments so binding? So shackling that we keep losing our reasoning and analytical abilities. Repeating the same mistake all over again, only to hurt ourselves and others?
“Another’s ego is another’s problem. Don’t make it yours. Make your life happy and balanced. Don’t be affected by others.” – Smt Hansaji J Yogendra
Feelings of love and attachment stem from one’s EGO which is, love of self or self-centeredness. We justify our relationships, as we create a sense of belonging, which is usually more on the lines of possessing and controlling rather than nurturing and building relationships. Our love for our child, spouse, car, house and jewellery – all the belongings to the minuscule level has the stamp of “ME and MINE” –the root cause of all our problems. The thought of any sort of loss is highly disturbing and frightening. With our attachments, we create this watertight trap for ourselves, thinking and believing our world is going to be the way we want it to be …forever! One keeps improvising on the same self-created model (of life) to suit one’s preferences. We go on acquiring and catering to the never ending desires with the hope that once this is done, one will be happier and will at last experience the elusive peace of mind. Never once do we pause to ponder,’ if this happiness and peace we are yearning for is solely found outside of us?’
These unending desires keep fuelling one’s appetite for more; resulting in a stronger and longer period of pain. The awareness and realisation of , ‘Love of self’ being the culprit for all our pain; stemming from the substratum of our attachments is the key to implement objectivity in one’s thoughts and actions.This is a gradual process, where one shifts love of self to encompass everyone around steadily overtime. Actions devoid of agendas and focus on overall happiness contribute to objective behaviour, which in turn helps to let go of past disappointments and move forward positively.
Once on National Geographic channel, I watched a mother bear teaching her three cubs how to fish. Unaware by the mother one of the cubs gets carried away by the water current, landing in front of a ferocious male bear who, instantly pounces and kills the cub. The agitated mother realising this, immediately swims back to the shore to her dead cub and keeps nudging the cub with the hope to revive the cub. Once she realises the fact that there is nothing more she can do, she sits quietly beside the cub. She grieves for a while then gets up and resolutely ambles towards her other two cubs, huddles them together and moves on facing the reality. We could learn this beautiful lesson on Objectivity from Mother Nature. Very often when one professes one’s love to another, with all the intensity that is required to convince the other, the professor is in all likelihood expressing his or her self’s perception of love-an emotion that has nothing to do with the other’s feelings. This euphoria tends to cease as quickly as it began, since it is lacking in the objectivity that stems from caring for other’s emotion.
Expression of true Love has a lot to do with acceptance of everything and everyone ‘As Is’. This deeper insight about love for anything, totally changes its perspective. Its dimensions open up to a broader, everlasting expressions of “Care” where the emphasis is on giving, caring and sharing rather than expectations of receiving, wanting or desiring. This is not a state of compromise or martyrdom for the sake of smooth continuity, but a true state of joy seemingly where one’s own comfort and priority takes the back seat willingly and spontaneously, as one regales in the comfort and happiness of others.This attitude is the result of cultivating the art of being objective. This in turn depends on one’s perspective of approach to relationships, situations and purpose.
Live by natures law is a most appealing philosophy. It is very clear that to get something one has to give something. An attitude of “Let go” feeling eases stress levels and simplifies one’s living, empowering one to function with a balanced state of mind. It equips one to live life as one BEFITS to live, versus to live life as one WANTS to.
Any karma, first originates in the mind as thought, then manifests as action through the body. These actions could be of Klishta (painful) or Aklishta (pain free) tendencies. The more klishta thoughts, the more negative actions (karmas) and negative imprints will get collected in our Karmashaya (Psyche) for our own future experiences. Is it possible to eradicate the Klishta imprints from our Psyche?
Answer lies in mastery over slow and steady cultivation of Objectivity.