Q&A on ‘Yoga for the Golden Years’ at the Satsang, 17th Feb 2013

The topic for the Hindi Satsang on Sunday, 17th February, 2013 was ‘Yoga for the Golden Years.’

Following is the transcript of the Q & A between the audience and Dr. Jayadeva Yogendra and Smt. Hansaji Yogendra.

Smt. Hansaji and Dr. Jayadeva Yogendra
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Q. How to help the in-laws who do not respect each other, treat each other as the enemy and constantly fight.
Dr. J: You see, this desire to help should stop. Let them carry on in the way they are carrying on and I think you’ll be able to build up better relations.
Smt. H: Let them fight, that is their entertainment. Why are you interfering?Q. New generation is mostly self-centred, not much concerned about elders in the family. How to get adjusted with this situation?
Dr. J: One should carry on one’s duty. That should be the central point.
Smt. H: Why should they be concerned about you? You should take care of yourself. Don’t think that in old age, people will even get drinking water for you. If that’s so, your health will get affected. Rather in old age, one should do one’s own work and even lend a helping hand when needed because you are not going to work any more for the whole day. Do not expect young people to be with you all the time of keep asking you what you need. One day I saw an advertisement on television that showed the woman giving the toothbrush to the man and he goes to brush, she gives the towel to him and he goes to bathe. Nonsense! We must never do this. Every individual should be self-reliant. If someone needs help, then help. This same thing should continue even in old age.

Q. At the age of 30, how can I develop an attitude to ensure that I move towards a graceful golden age?
Dr. J: Well, this should be an attitude and not related to age. One should be doing one’s own duties all the time.
Smt. H: One should have good habits from now itself. Person should be health conscious, should have faith in Higher Reality, should be caring for self and everybody around and not be selfish. “I will do this, whether you like it or not,” this attitude should be dropped and one should work in harmony with others. So if this kind of approach is developed at this age, even in old age your life will e beautiful. So learn yoga.

Q. To ‘support’ or ‘advise,’ are they not supplemental to each other?
Dr. J: Less advice, the better.
Smt. H: In advising, we only use our mouth. When we support, we give our warmth and energy. So stop the talking and start supporting.

Q. How to find out the expectations of the old which may be unfulfilled, to improve the relationship with them?
Dr. J: Whatever you think is correct, you should carry out.
Smt. H: It is not always possible to fulfill someone’s expectations a 100 %. Do how much is possible for you. At other times, the person may grumble, so don’t try to satisfy others in life. Whatever is genuine, whatever you think is right, you should do. I know one family where there are 9 sister-in-laws and 3 brother-in-laws. The eldest daughter-in-law was earning and the son was also doing very well. The whole family would expect that they should give enough to the rest of them, like big gifts if there is a birthday. The mother-in-law would tell them, “Give him 10,000 Rupees,” etc. They were wondering how to go about because they used to give with love but there was no end to expectations. So we told her “That is their problem, not your problem.” So she has managed very well. During sickness, she would be there to help. So you have to find out how to go about it; show your sincerity, be available. But don’t throw money like that. Money is such a thing that does not satisfy, no matter how much you give a person.

Q. How will we know how our experience of old age will be? Our life depends on our body.
Dr. J: Become old, and you will know everything.
Smt. H: And to become old, you have to live that long. These days people get heart attacks at 22-25 years of age and so they don’t see old age. It was found that more deaths are occurring between 30-50 years. So make sure that we don’t harbour negativity and stress at this age.

Satsang is an open meeting held every Sunday from 9:30 to 10:30 am at The Yoga Institute, Santacruz East, Mumbai. It involves an interesting presentation to the public, made by the students of the Teacher Training Course. Each week, a new presentation of a Yogic concept is made in a simple way through skits and decoration for the general public, followed by a short speech from our Gurus, Dr. Jayadeva and Smt. Hansaji Yogendra.