How to Set Boundaries and Protect Your Energy

At times, our energy gets sapped while interacting with certain individuals or by being part of certain situations. This can be very exhausting. Why does this sudden drop in energy happen? Can we safeguard our energy? Yes, we can safeguard it. 

It is important to understand that we are responsible for ourselves; our thoughts, our feelings, and also, our boundaries. They may be different from others and that is completely ok as we are all different individuals. Let us normalize and prioritize ourselves. Our boundaries are as important as anyone else’s. 

Let us begin by recognizing our boundaries. Sometimes our boundaries do not align with the boundaries of others, for example, when acquaintances ask us extremely personal questions, that may make us uncomfortable. To understand this, we must become aware of our behavioral patterns, without self-judgement, which may arise when our expectations are not aligned with societal expectations. Many times, despite disliking the company that we are in, we are obliged to continue to stay due to peer pressure or fear of being rude. Acceptance is the first step towards seeking a solution. Accepting the boundaries of ourselves and others, we can find effective resolution for these concerns. 

What should we do when our boundaries are being exploited?

What would be the correct way to respond to such a situation? Pause, and reflect. Is our behavior leading to this overstepping of boundaries? Communicate the discomfort with kindness. Learn to say ‘No’ with compassion and not rudeness. This may not be easy due to some of our attachments, so to set boundaries and find peace, we must let go of these attachments. As per yoga, it is our duty towards ourselves (SvaDharma) to set these boundaries for ourselves and others.

Through asanas, we can understand ourselves and our boundaries. The asanas work as energy booster yoga solutions to setting our boundaries. The meditative postures such as Yogendra Sukhasana, Yogendra Padmasan, Yogendra Vajrasana, and Yogendra Sthithaprarthanasana, etc help us understand our body and observe our thoughts. They help us attain a state of balance through our bodies, and into our thoughts. Asanas such as Yogendra Talasana, Yogendra Utkatasana, Yogendra Konasana, Yogendra Ekpadasana, etc help us observe our mind as these postures require immense mental strength and firmness, that we may require to set boundaries and find peace. The asanas that help us let go of our attachments include the forward bending asanas such as Yogendra Paschimmottanasana, Yogendra Yoga Mudra, Yogendra Chakrasana, etc require us to surrender ourselves to the nature of gravity and let go of the unfounded beliefs that stop us from accepting our boundaries. The backward bending asanas such as Yogendra Bhujangasana, Yogendra Dhanurvakrasana, Yogendra Salabhasana, Yogendra Ustrasana, etc. bring us compassion and clarity of thoughts, devoid of any clutter or arrogance. 

Other than these, there is an amazing energy booster Yoga Pranayama that helps us set our boundaries and protect our energy. That is, Yogendra Pranayama - Anulom Vilom, this Pranayama regulates the natural way of breathing which brings balance between positive and negative effects of breathing on both the body and mind, this brings about quietude and inner harmony and helps us recognize and accept our boundaries and stand our ground for them. Let us understand how it is to be done. 

• Condition yourself by sitting in any meditative posture such as Sukhasana or Padmasana (if not possible, sit on a chair with your back erect).
• Do a few rounds of inhalation and exhalation. Hold the right-hand fingers to the nostrils in Pranav Mudra – the little ring finger resting on the left nostril and the thumb on the right one; the forefinger and the middle finger bent.
• After exhalation, close both the nostrils and suspend breath (Shunyaka). 
• Now, releasing the thumb, inhale smoothly from the right nostril (Puraka). 
• Close both nostrils and retain the breath for double the time of inhalation (Kumbhaka). 
• Releasing the left nostril, exhale smoothly from the left nostril, time equal to inhalation (Rechaka). 
• Immediately, inhale from the left nostril (Puraka). 
• Close both nostrils and retain the breath for double the inhalation period (Kumbhaka). 
• Release the thumb, and exhale smoothly the right nostril (Rechaka). 
• Close both the nostrils and suspend the breath (Shunyaka). 
• Now close the right nostril and inhale from the left one. 
• Do Kumbhaka for double the inhalation period and exhale smoothly from the right one. 
• Immediately, inhale from the right one. 
• Do Kumbhaka and exhale from the left one. 
• Do Shunyaka to complete 1 round. 
• After Shunyaka, take a few normal breaths and relax.

Recommended practice:

Practice 5 rounds/ day daily, starting with a count of 2:4:2:2 seconds. Gradually increase it by 1 sec/ week to a maximum ratio of 8:16:8:8 – 8 secs inhalation and exhalation, 16 secs retention, and 8 secs suspension. 

Limitations/ Contraindications –

• Not to be practiced by children under 14 years of age. 
• Cardiac patients should NOT exceed their time capacity and should practice without holding and suspension.  

Benefits:

• Favorable pressure changes in the lungs for better oxygenation. 
• Experiences quietude and inner harmony. 
• Sedative effect on the nervous system – concentration is improved. 
• Balances the energies in our system that help cope with pains and aches. 

Yogic techniques such as Pratipaksha Bhavana can also assist us in protecting our energy and maintaining a balanced state of mind, promoting healthy and positive thoughts is essential.

Pratipaksha Bhavana (opposite emotions) is a technique introduced to us by the founder of The Yoga Institute, Shri Yogendraji. This technique helps us cultivate positive thoughts as soon as negative thoughts pop into our minds. This practice can help uplift our energy and thus is a good habit to cultivate so that one can be in a positive frame of mind at all times. By transmuting negative thoughts into positive ones, one not only protects one’s energy but also gets into the habit of not thinking negatively.

Another meditative technique suggested by yoga is Mauna (silence). It is a sacred practice of maintaining silence intentionally. This practice of limiting our speech helps us conserve our energy, regulates our emotions, and promotes clarity and peace, as the majority of our energy is drained through talking. 

These yoga techniques serve as a remedy to help one create healthy boundaries, thus helping one protect one’s energy.